Hey guys! It's been a while since I wrote but today is the season 4 premiere of my show Mind of Mencia and I wanted to take this time to write to you and thank you guys for making it possible. I know that without you watching the show and supporting me, there would be no Mind of Mencia.

I'm really busy taping the episodes and hope that you like what's coming up. This is going to be the best season ever. We have a new stage design, new opening credits, new characters, it's really great.

Tickets have just gone on sale for my new tour starting in a couple of months and people have been asking me about adding shows here and there. We're working on getting some more dates added, but when we do, you guys will be the first to know.

Oh, I also wanted to take this time to write to everyone and thank you for the amazing response I've received with my new stand-special "Performance Enhanced". I have gotten so many great emails and comments that it's taking me a long time to read through all of them but man it's great to see how you guys reacted to it.

So, thanks for everything guys. Tune in this season to Mind of Mencia, back on Wednesdays at 10:30/9:30 central starting TONIGHT, May 21st!

Ok, ok, so you noticed I changed the name a little bit.

Hi, I’m Cristela Alonzo.  I’ll be hanging out with you guys here on this blog and letting you know what’s going on in the world of Mind of Mencia.  This is what I look like:

I think it’s important to have a face with a name.  I’m not just Cristela now; I’m Cristela…the girl that takes pictures with a light bulb.  I know you might be thinking, “Who the hell are you?”

I’m actually the warm-up comic for the show.  Every time they tape an episode, I’m there to entertain the audience and let them know what’s going on.   I used to be a writer on the show during the second season as well.  What’s the favorite piece that I wrote?  Thank you for asking.  It’s a sketch called “Wetback Mountain.”

Some of you MIGHT be thinking that I look familiar; there’s an easy answer to that:  we used to date.  That’s right, I’ve dated all of you. Kidding.  The reason I may look familiar is because I’ve been the opening act for Carlos Mencia on his past tours.  If you’ve seen him live in the past couple of years, chances are, you’ve also seen me. Here’s my MySpace Link so that you can see some pics from the tour and prove to you that I really exist:

Proof that I'm real

See? I told you I was real.  I wanted to write this blog because I want to share with everyone the OTHER side of Mind of Mencia that you don’t get to see. I’m here to talk about things that are coming up, funny things that have happened and really get to know YOU guys as well.   I’ll be asking your opinions on everything so that we can talk about them here and REALLY let you have the chance to be part of the show.

I’m really excited to be doing this and hope that you hang out on a regular basis because I’ll be here, typing away. Unless the New Kids on the Block announce the Los Angeles date of their tour, then I’ll be in line waiting for tickets.  Whoops, have I said too much?  Um, I think I'm going to make myself a cup of coffee...I'll be back in a little bit.

Check out Carlos' new Mencia Minute entitled British Soldiers.
And, no, he's not talking about Sgt. Pepper!

Now that you're done....post something!

It's now time to vote on your favorite quote from Episode #303!
Here are this weeks nominees:

#1. "If you're gonna say Dee-Dee-Dee, say it right! It's three syllables. It's Dee, followed by Dee, followed by Dee!"

#2. "Set him free! Set him free! Lord Almighty set this black man free!"

#3. "Welcome to "Are you Smarter than a Wetback?" The show where Wetbacks don't pick lettuce, they pick answers."

#4. Welcome to Guatemala: the Taint of Central America.

#5. Mind of a Midget!

As always if anything else resonated with you from the show - feel free to write-in your favorite quote!